To Flounders! (S'Lon, Robyn private)

[S'Lon]

Once out of the Mariners Box, S'Lon led Robyn down the short length of Cat Street and onto the Shvakkim. As soon as they were round the corner and out of easy sight of anyone who had watched their departure he collapsed back against the wall of the building there.

Breathing deeply, he wiped his forehead, which suddenly seemed damp as the reaction to the stress in the Tavern set in. Realising he was ignoring Robyn who he had left standing there, probably wondering what was going on, he chalked up another black mark in his conscience, and the gloom that had briefly lifted with the elation at succeeding in buying Robyn, returned with full force. What a loathsome thing to do he thought. Once I have seen her set up and able to fend for herself, I will go and bury myself in the wilderness and never come back.

Unable to meet her eyes and see the loathing there, afraid of her in a way that he had not been when facing Jacobs anger, he reached up and removed the collar and leash, holding them and then throwing them away as though they were poisonous.

”I’m sorry that you had to hear that” he began and then faltered, for what excuse could he offer to justify the way he had treated her. Surely there had been a way of achieving her freedom, something that a man of honour could have found, something that would have preserved what dignity she had. He shook his head ”Never mind, I’m sorry. Come with me and we’ll find you somewhere you can sleep in peace for a change.”

Head down and wrapped in his obsessive self-pity he stepped off towards Flounders, with hardly a side glance to see if she followed.

[Robyn Meiers]

Robyn walked with S'lon, not quite sure what to expect. She looked at him leaning against the wall, and saw the sweat on his face. She realised how afraid of Jacob he must have been, how desperately he had just worked to get her out of trouble. And considering everything, as well. She wanted to form the words to tell him how grateful she was, but she was still in some kind of shock about the whole thing. So she looked at him, unsure of what to do.

He can't even look at me! she thought. She knew he was a kind man, but that he was so disgusted with her and still bought her was something that surprised her, still. Her eyes widened in suprise as he reached up and her face broke into a smile as he removed the collar and lead. She didn't think that there were people in the world like him any more.

Then he spoke, and she lowered her eyes. He's sorry he had to say it in front of me..... She didn't know what to say, and she had just decided on something when she looked up. And saw that he was walking away.

So she trotted after him, and then put her hand on his arm, trying to stop him from his determined walk. She wouldn't have dared do that to Jacob, of course, but she was a young woman with a determined nature.

Look she said, her voice quiet and shaking slightly I know you didn't wanna buy me, an' that you did it outta the goodness of yer 'eart. I appreciate it, I really do. An' I know that you don't wanna... well, you know, but I swear, i'll cook 'n' clean for ya like you wanted. I'll make sure that you are as comfortable as you can be, an' I'll do me best not to get in yer way too much...

She stopped for a moment, and then looked into his eyes, her own determined and with the slightest spark in them once again.

I want you to know that no one's eva done nuffink so kind fer me, no one. Thank you...master. She did her best not to bite that last word out, but she couldn't help it having a slight inflection. After all, she had hoped that he was her friend, not someone who found her disgusting and corpse like...

An' I just wanted to ask something, if I can.... she continued what did I do wrong? The question was heartfelt and honest. Her green eyes flashed at him as she looked, tears threatening once again, but this time pride and stubborness got in their path, and she did not give in..... What did I do wrong? she mumbled, quieter this time...

ooc: I know that I've changed the characters eye colour, but I love that avvy - please forgive a crazy woman and ignore all violet comments as being a gross misspelling of green!

[S'Lon]

Her hand on his arm was enough to stop him, and he paused and turned towards her, though still unable to meet her eyes. Her gentle words were not what he expected. Missing were the words of hate and scorn that he deserved and in surprise he raised his eyes and for the first time looked directly at her.

Her words echoed in his mind and he stared at her for a few moments while the meaning penetrated, though he flinched when she called him Master.

”Wrong?” He repeated. ”You never did anything wrong, I don’t understand what you mean by that.” He gently reached for her hand before continuing. ”You cannot imagine how much I wanted to free you from that man, and I couldn’t think of any other way than to buy you from him.”.

He dropped his gaze from her eyes and his face flamed with embarrassment, but he owed her an apology, I can’t avoid it, and I’m a coward for not doing it straight away. Looking at his feet, he unknowingly placed himself in the position he had placed her earlier and wished the ground would open up and swallow him. ”I was hoping to meet with Jacob privately so that I could find out if he would sell you to me. When he came into the Tavern with you and the others I realised that I could not wait, but when he invited me to sit at the table I could not risk getting into a bidding war with the others for I don’t have unlimited funds and I might have lost you forever.

He forced himself to look back up and meet her eyes as a penance for the pain he had caused her. ”What I did then was unforgivable and I don’t blame you for hating me. Some of the things I said about you will haunt me for the rest of my life and I can’t begin to tell you how disgusted I feel about saying them. As for doing it out of the goodness of my heart, I suppose I deserve you to mocking me like that after what I put you through out there.”

“Any debt you feel towards me for the purchase is far outweighed by the pain I have caused you. I won’t make you cook or clean for me or do anything else that you don’t want to. All I ever wanted was to be your friend, though how that brought me here to this desperate situation I really don’t understand.”

Realising that he was starting to babble he pulled himself together. Just stay with me long enough to allow me to get you on your feet, that’s all I ask. He gripped her hand with both of his and his eyes pleaded with her for some word of forgiveness. He searched her green eyes for something that would show that perhaps she did not hate him completely.

[Robyn Meiers]

At least he's looking at me, not avoiding my eyes all the time she thought to herself as he lifted his gaze to meet her eyes. As he took a moment or two to consider, she watched him with interest, not quite sure of what his facial expression meant.

As he told her that he wanted to free her from Jacob, her face showed her deep emotions, she smiled a sad and grateful smile and her eyes filled with tears. But not the harsh tears of just a few moments ago, no these were the tears of a young woman who is unsure of how to express the deep emotion she was feeling.

She nodded, her expression thoughtful as she listened to him explain why he didn't want to get into a bidding war, she understood the lack of funds, that was for sure. She smiled at him wryly as he explained what it was that motivated him, her green eyes shining with some deep emotion. It looked like compassion.

Then, as he continued to talk, she blinked. She took a moment to digest the information, and then she blinked again. She listened, not speaking, as he continued to talk, and her face broke into a smile. There was no hatred in those eyes, no anger in her face. She looked at him and she did something that may, perhaps, seem somewhat incongrous. She chuckled.

'ang on a minute. What yer tellin' me is that you lied so that 'e'd sell me to ya? An' you feel the need to apologise to me for that. For getting me outta that 'orrible situation into a much better one?

She looked at him with a fond expression, enjoying the feel of his hands holding hers. With her other hand, she reached up and touched his cheek, gently caressing the side of his face as she did, stroking his hair behind his ear and smiling gently.

You are a kind man....S'lon....an I am really grateful for everything you've done for me. she purposely avoided the word master, since she saw how displeased he was with it. I know that you've put yerself in a right old state for me, an I'm really grateful. An' at the end of the day, I don't want you to make me leave....

She didn't take her eyes from him during the entirity of what she said, as she spoke, she watched him, his eyes, his face.

I wanna do wot's right, ya know? An' you bought me. So I'm yours, an' that's ok wiv me. That's better than ok wiv me, cos frankly, you're the nicest person I've eva met and you make me feel like there's 'ope in me life. An' you just saved me life. Not that he was goin' a kill me, but I was gonna die if I stayed wiv him. Maybe not outside, but inside. So you saved me life. I wanna stay wiv you, if you'll let me. I'll try an' find some way to repay ya....

She looked at him, then, her young face showing more age than it ever should.

An if you was lying, well, then I can fink of a few ways that you might earn that money back pretty quick, you know. I mean, he was charging 100 crowns a night for me, so we can make yer money back pretty quick, if that's wot you want....

She shrugged, and looked away for the first time.

But I'll do whatever you want me to. If you wanna hire me out, that's fine. If you wanna keep me fer yerself, that's fine too. Hell, if you want me to cook and clean, I'll do that. Just please don't make me leave. Yer the only person I've eva met who was nice to me. Please don't make me leave....

[S'Lon]

As he waited hoping against all expectation that somewhere in her reply there would be some scrap, some morsel that he could hold close in his memory when she was gone, he puzzled over the expressions that had crossed her face as he spoke. If he had not known better he would have guessed them to be quite contrary to what he was expecting and the anticipation and dread of her answer dried his throat and knotted his stomach.

Her smile and chuckle made him flinch internally, for surely now she was going to mock him. He had lowered his defences and dropped his guard and now she was going to exact her revenge for his cruelty. The words therefore were a surprise when he finally realised was merely answering him, but still he awaited her punishment.

The gentle touch on the side of his face could have felled him. When he saw the arm move he steeled himself to accept the blow, expecting at least a slap. Instead, the soft touch of her fingers brushing against his cheek thrilled him and a tremor ran through him as the fingers ran along his cheek and behind his ear. His fingers spasmed slightly against her other hand as the reaction ran down his arms.

His emotions were now fully engaged and also completely confused, which mirrored accurately the state of his mind. His gaze flickered from her deep, green eyes to the sensuous curves of her lips as she spoke, barely understanding what she was saying and only the final phrase really penetrated through the fog of thoughts and emotions that her touch had aroused. I don't want you to make me leave… she doesn’t want to leave? Finally he began to realise that she was not responding as he had expected and he started to listen more closely to her words, though his confusion did not lessen.

As he listened to her, he realised that she was grateful to him and his heart missed a beat. The fact was like a rock in a storm and he clung to it while the sea of his emotions crashed around him. He struggled to control his feelings with only minimal success. He had gone to the tavern driven by an undefined need to rescue Robyn, but the discovery that he might lose her had pushed him an emotional direction that had been unexpected and indeed he still did not even realise that it had happened. Unknown or not, it had driven him to take unprecedented steps, the repercussions of which had rocked the very roots of what he believed to be his moral standards. Unrecognised and unfulfilled emotions wracked him, his mind a battleground of conflicting desires.

As she looked away at last, he fought back an urge to take her in his arms and comfort her; despite her words, he was sure that it would be misinterpreted. And the urge itself surprised him; for it seemed not just a desire to comfort her but also that her touch would comfort him.

”Oh Robyn, I don’t want you to leave me” he choked out, then tried to get better control of his speech. I don’t want to make you do anything that you don’t want to. I never bought you just to use you, and as for hiring you out, I don’t want to do that. I suppose that there is nothing I can do to stop you if that’s what you choose to do, but it’s not what I want.”

The urge to hold her returned more powerfully now and he was hard pressed to control himself. What in Jorels name are you doing he thought, just because she is grateful to you doesn’t mean that she cares for you. The thought erupting from some hidden part of his mind stopped him cold and got his full attention. Care for me…? The realisation that he had gone too far in his mind and presumed too much on his fledgling friendship with Robyn was like the slap he had expected earlier. His mind freed from the dread of Robyns scorn was running high on emotions, bouncing from one extreme to another and he needed time to try and get a grip.

Freeing one hand from his grip on hers he reached upwards and softly gripped her chin, moving her head so that he could see her eyes. ”Lets stop discussing this here on the street, for my mind is awhirl and I don’t know what to think. I can’t take you back to the Hall, and I don’t fancy the fleapit behind the Box so shall we continue over to the Flounders Inn where we can get some privacy to talk?”

As he spoke his eye drifted downwards for a moment and he realised that walking into Flounders with Robyn dressed as she was might cause problems, but after the dramas of the last candlemarks it was the least of his concerns. Letting go of her chin he gestured with his arm in the direction of the better tavern.

[Robyn Meiers]

She felt the fingers that held her hand spasm, and she squeezed them gently, her fingers softly running over his thumbs as she caressed his hand. She saw the range of emotions cross his face and she wondered what it was that was going on in his head. She smiled gently as she realised that she wondered that more and more at the moment, and she wondered about how quickly he had become significant to her. She wasn't sure why, she wasn't someone who usually simply trusted people, but she trusted this man. That was it, for her, she supposed, she trusted him. But that was a lie, and she knew that too. It wasn't all - there was more, but she didnt fully understand what she was feeling, and she didn't really understand a lot of what S'lon was saying.

Then, he said that he didn't want her to leave him, and she smiled. No, she beamed . As he spoke, she kept her hand on his face, relishing the feel of his skin on hers. Then, as he finished speaking, she dropped her hand, but she kept the other hand in his.

Then he cupped her chin in his hand and she felt the touch as though it were a bolt of electricity coursing through her. She gasped slightly as he did it, but not in a way that indicated fear, rather the heightened emotions that she saw mirrored in his eyes.

She wasn't sure what he was going to do, as he cupped her chin in his hand Is he going to kiss me? but she knew that she liked the feeling of him touching her in such a gentle and friendly way. She felt a sudden, almost overwhelming urge to make sure that he didn't regret buying her he bought me.... She smiled as he told her that he couldn't stop her from doing anything I'm his, he owns me, doesn't he realise that but she didn't argue with him right now. Now didn't seem to be the time, honestly.

Ok. Lets go to Flounders, whatever you want. But S'lon, you know I'm not exactly dressed for a posh place, ya know. If it's posh they're gonna assume that I'm a prostitute, aren't they? Which is fine, cos I am, but I don't wanna get you into no trouble nor nuffink. Really....

She watched him as she spoke, and realised that she missed the feel of his hand on her face, missed the way his touch made her feel. She didn't fully understand the emotions that were running through her head, much less what it was that was going on inside the head of this strange, kind man that had saved her.

So she decided that going somewhere they could talk was a good idea after all, and so she followed him, since she didn't know the way herself.