A Room With a View - Shawntay

[Ulfr Grimsson]

ooc: I'm going to assume that I had a room in the Headless Orc - I was grandfathered in the Suns thread which meant I never sorted out my accomodation.

Ionnolia, 3rd brightening of Kalendryas
Autumn, Era XI

Ulfr waited in the bar of the Headless Orc for Shawntay, slowly sipping at his ale and mind a thousand miles away, tramping the mountains and city streets of far off provinces. It was a dream that alternated between doing so in exploration and of doing so in an established pattern, building his wealth.

His eyes flickered around the bar to see if she had come in while he was distracted for he hoped that she would be interested as well, but it wasn't the sort of thing to discuss in a public bar. He hoped that she would arrive as agreed, but he didn't keep his hopes too high and since his glance hadn't revealed the familiar redhead he drifted off into his day dream again.

[Shawntay]

Shawn pondered over why she agreed to meet with him at the Headless Orc. Inwardly she knew why 'she' had desired so deeply to see him once more but she couldn't help but to wonder just what his motives were. Perhaps he was just bored or perhaps he longed to see her just as much as she did him. The female released a grunt and continued to walk on as she began to curse herself due to the fantasy that existed within her since the day that she accidentally ran into the tall, dark blonde, blue-eyed male. In an instant she found herself sauntering through the heavy wooden door of the Inn. It didn't take but a minute to locate his where abouts, sitting at the bar, sipping of his ale. Shawn girded herself up, pulling her cape around her body like a blanket as she approached him from behind. Softly the red headed woman spoke, tapping him upon the shoulder. "Good evening Ulfr." Almost shyly she awaited his response.

[Ulfr Grimsson]

He jumped at the touch on his shoulder, a jerk that spilt ale over the hand that held the tankard and he was half off his stool before the voice registered in his mind. He settled back down onto the seat and turned, a smile breaking across his face at the sight of her, though this brightening, she had shrouded herself under her cape.

Good evening Shawntay, he nodded his head, thank you for coming this evening. Can I get you a drink? He waved for the bartender as he spoke and ran his eyes over what he could see of her shape before resting his eyes once more on her face and he was reminded as to why he had been so keen to see her again. He wondered why she had accepted since she surely could have done better than a jobless outcast, but he realised that perhaps she didn't realise that.

[Shawntay]

Even though Shawn was seemingly prepared for his turn about inwardly she shuddered silently. A smile, however, did wave over her features when he immediately recognized her, blue eyes traveling over her cloaked clothed body. Flashes of thoughts about his body tossed about in her mind until he spoke, jaunting her back to the realization of their secret meeting; secret as in only the two of them knew of it. And as it seemed they both whole-heartedly agreed to it.

In response to his invitation Shawn nodded, speaking in her usual soft tones. "I'd 'love' a drink. Shall we sit someplace more private?" The female exaggerated the word 'love' with a smile but the thought of them actually being able to reside alone in order to speak sent chills up her spine. The Tavern began to feel quite warm beneath the shrouded folds of her heavy cloak. Shawn shifted toward the private table in the corner. Her eyes though did not fail to watch every expression that issued forth from his male features. Occasionally her gaze would turn upward toward the marking upon his forehead.

[Ulfr Grimsson]

He smiled with pleasure that she accepted his offer of a drink, not that she was unlikely to refuse considering she had actually bothered to turn up to see him, but he didn't take the thought that far for he was concentrating on the end of the sentance, the one where she wanted more privacy.

An image of his room upstairs sprang unbidden to his mind and then shattered as he realised that she actually meant the table in the corner and he nodded though his smile slipped just fractionally. That would be good, I'll join you in a moment with the drinks.

He was pleased despite the little jig that his emotions had just played, for he wanted to share his ideas with someone, even if it was someone that he didn't know, just to see if he was being wildly unrealistic and the fact that she was a woman would surely help in that. Of course, the fact that it was her was reason all by itself for wanting to sit at a private table and just back in her company.

It occured to him as he carried the drinks over that perhaps she was merely being polite by meeting him, and hoped that her intent wasn't simply to find a way of getting rid of him. He shrugged the thought off, burying it as deep as he could, stamping it down afterwards and placed the drinks on the table. He shifted the chair slightly so that it was a little nearer to her and slid into it.

Thanks for coming Shawntay, I'm really pleased that you made it and I hope that I'm not keeping you from anything?

[Shawntay]

"That would be good, I'll join you in a moment with the drinks." His words were a clear indication as to what she should do next and so she left his side in order to retrieve the desired table in the corner. As she waited for him, after taking a comfortable seat, she watched him. Shawn's eyes were content with just observing his every move. In fact she would be content all day just doing what she's doing now. One could learn a lot by merely using the perceptive powers of their eyes.

Moments passed by swiftly. Shawn seemed as though she were daydreaming when Ulfr made his way to the back table, her chin resting comfortably in the palm of her hand. A few times she blinked and then grinned up at him, still wondering why he had wanted to meet with 'her', of all people. With such thoughts the half elf took the initiative and took her drink. Perhaps the alcohol would calm her nerves and improve her thinking, jolting it into a more positive mode. Needless to say she didn't think that a man like Ulfr would be interested in the likes of a former slave girl that was later used as a cooking and cleaning woman aboard a ship.

The ale was wonderful, as was the close proximity of Ulfr. His voice was as the sounds of a thousand angels singing, or so were the thoughts of Shawn. "Thanks for coming Shawntay, I'm really pleased that you made it and I hope that I'm not keeping you from anything?" A giggle issued forth from between her ale laced lips. She wasn't laughing at Ulfr but rather at the thought of him 'keeping' her from something. Quite frankly she wasn't up to anything. She had no plans what so ever and so the company was welcomed. Shawn took another swig of her ale to empower her boldness. "Oh! You’re not keeping me from anything, nothing at all in fact. I guess you could say that I'm still trying to get my life together, without much success....I might add."

[Ulfr Grimsson]

Ulfr felt a qualm of nervousness as she giggled at his question, a qualm that quietened and relaxed away as she explained what she meant and he smiled back at her, his earlier drinking having done much to soften his mood. Once upon a time he, as with any young male had built up a high tolerance level for ale, but his time in the wilderness with only water to drink had meant he had lost that skill, and somehow he had never been motivated to rebuild it. Possibly that was because he had avoided making friends and drowning his sorrows hadn't appealed either.

He grinned at her, his eyes drawn to her moist lips and shuddered slightly, closing his eyes to the temptation. Trying to get your life together? He laughed softly, wondering what could be so hard for such a woman, but the scar drew his attention and the laugh died back into a smile. I'm sorry, I just find it hard to imagine that a beautiful woman such as yourself would find difficulty, and even harder to imagine that you have nothing to do.

He took a quick sip of his ale to wet his suddenly dry throat and wondered if perhaps this evening just happened to be free, perhaps all of her friends were busy. Do you mind me asking what you are trying to rebuild your life into?

[Shawntay]

His questions, inquiries and comments were direct and to the point. His forwardness actually proved to relax Shawn, thinking that perhaps someone was actually personally interested in her, longing to know all about her life, past and present, perhaps every detail, more than just wanting to sleep with her as their goal. Shawn smiled when he laughed, immediately seeming apologetic when he offered an explanation as to why he was laughing. His reasoning was understandable. Instantly the pale blue eyed redhead's smile grew even wider as she pushed her hair back with her hands, the red strands sliding in between her fingers as it was being drawn up in a non-fashionable bun, using the tie that she had around her thin wrist. Shawn nodded in agreement. "I can understand why it may seem as though I have not a care in this world but I've not had an easy life. I'm sure that you know that I am new to Imperia. I have no job and no prospects really."

After a few moments of silence, pondering over the right things to say, Shawn spoke again, trying to respond to his every word. "Beautiful?" The female traced her nimble fingertips softly over the scar that laced her cheek as she looked down and into the amber ale that had comforted her in the past. The rest of her body held similar scars, though she dared not tell him that at this time, it being to embarrassing for her to bear. "Well anyway. I have no friends since I've been aboard a ship for most of my life and a slave before that. I've been cleaning and cooking for several hundred men." Shawn let out a chuckle. That story sounded less real when spoken out loud. With an awkward smile she looked up at Ulfr. She immediately looked into his eyes, wondering if he believed a single word that she had just spoken, wondering what he might think of her and the prospect of her being trapped aboard a ship with so many men. Would he think of her as a whore? Shawn imagined that he would be getting up soon, thinking that she had slept around quite a bite.

But the conversation went on. He issued another question, an important one. And so she answered, now not having anything to hide. "Do you mind me asking what you are trying to rebuild your life into?" Shawn left off touching her facial scar and took another long draught of her ale before she spoke, draining her mug dry. "I don't mind you asking. You can ask me anything you wish as long as you do not prematurely misjudge me. Things are not always what they appear at first glance..... Since I've been a slave and aboard a ship of men for most of my life, now having been free for the first time since childhood, I want something better. I'm not sure what yet but what could be worse then being a slave?"

The half elf laughed and then, almost nervously, finished her ale. Part of her was fearing that he 'would' judge her harshly, before he got to know her and so she refused to take her cloak off, thinking that perhaps she would be leaving the bar soon anyway....

[Ulfr Grimsson]

Ulfr found it hard to beleive that this woman in front of him had once been a slave, after all what master would have freed such a woman? But she repeated the story and he couldn't find it in his heart to consider her as not telling the truth, though how much of that was down to the lust that she did not ascribe to him, but was growing nonetheless especially as she played with her hair; he could imagine only too well what it would be like to play with those long strands of red hair, pulling loose the tie and allowing the hair to cascade down across her naked... He pulled his thoughts abruptly out of the track that they had been following and felt his face heat. Surely if she was freed then she would be looking for a man who could take her out of that life forever, and she would never be interested in an outlaw.

He sighed and decided that while she was here, at least he could make the best of it and at least be able to pretend to himself that she might be interested in him. He watched her drain her ale and realised that his was also nearly empty, though of course he had started before her and he drained his own while he put his thoughts back into order and carefully avoided all thoughts of her hair and naked, ah, shoulders, that was it!

I'm pleased that you don't mind me asking, for I have a thousand questions that I want to ask, but for now I suppose that your last question deserves an answer. A slave can have dignity, perhaps only so much as they are allowed, but in their hearts they can have the dignity of knowing that they are merely following their orders, and such is their duty. No matter what you were forced to do as a slave, it wasn't your decision.

So, what could be worse than being a slave? Many things I think, such as having people despise you for something that you have done. He smiled grimly. Indeed I am sure that slavery is not something to be ashamed of. But this is perhaps maudlin talk and we are both dry, do you wish another ale? He gave no thought as to the effects of more ale, it was just a convenient way to break that conversation since he had come perilously close to a subject that might reveal too much of himself to her.

[Shawntay]

Shawn nodded toward him, in response to the question about the ale, the part of the conversation that was the most simple. She waited for the ale as they continued their 'interesting' conversation. Perhaps she would find out why he wore the mark of an outcast. "I was very young when I was a slave. Fortunately they did not yet look at me as a potential lover, since I was a very scrawny looking teenager." Shawn let out a giggle. Right then and there she decided to stay for a while and so she began to relieve herself of her cloak, letting it drape over the back of her chair as her shapely body was revealed to the dim light of the Tavern, and to any eyes that would choose to look.

Certain words that Ulfr said played over and over in Shawn's mind. "So, what could be worse than being a slave? Many things I think, such as having people despise you for something that you have done." She leaned forward, biting her bottom lip a little as she pondered over these. Again her pale blue eyes drifted toward the 'mark'. Perhaps she would ask about it or perhaps she should wait until the ale had time to work its magic. Shawn had no desire to push him away from her and so she would wait a little before asking such personal questions of him, after all it was she that revealed the personal things about herself and naturally he had to respond to them.

Shawn determined to let the subject of the conversation stay upon her for a while, reasoning that it may relax him enough so that his lips would become lose or perhaps he would feel the need of confession. "But anyway. Later I was sold at a slavers market and bought by a man that took pity on me. Lucky for me he looked upon me with fatherly eyes rather then lustful ones. He treated me like a daughter and protected me when he needed to." Now it was his turn. The female took a deep breath. It actually felt good to reveal some of her self to him. She actually felt lighter, but then again it could have just been the ale. Only time would tell.

[Ulfr Grimsson]

Other eyes might have been attracted to the movement where Shawntay took off her cloak, but Ulfr's eyes it was fair to say were glued fast to the action and what it revealed. He had memories from the previous times that he had met her, but this time was special for it was the first time that he had had her all to himself in a social situation. Here were no other me casting their lustful eyes on her, now it was just him and his tension at the confirmation that she intended to stay a little longer was visible in the tightness of his grip on the tankard.

Her story gripped him like his grip grasped firmly the ale and he listened intently, sure that he would not miss the smallest detail and he filed away the memories in a special place, hoarded where he could hold them to him in the future, memories of when he had been fortunate to have her for himself.

You are a lucky woman, he commented eventually and took a deep drink from the ale that he had got refilled for them both, to have had a master who looked kindly on you. I'm not at all sure that I could have resisted the temptation if I were him. He didn't say what the temptation was that he might have failed to resist and it might even have been true. But, I prefer you as a free woman even though it now gives you the power to break hearts, it also gives you the power to bestow your love and affection on a man, and a lucky man that would be. He stopped, suddenly embarrased as to where his thoughts were leading and he realised that he was spilling out his private thoughts.

He smiled and drank once more to cover his face and to give him a moment to put his thoughts in order. It is strange, he said once the ale was back on the table. You are here looking to start a new life, and I am doing much the same. He glanced back up at her looking deeply into her eyes. I have wandered, lost and alone for so long, and it is in this city, a pit of depravity if I ever found one, and he spoke from recent personal experience. that I have been given a second chance, a chance to restart my life, finally putting the past behind me and not living with it constantly haunting me. He paused, unwilling to admit to his past.

[Shawntay]

Shawn felt his eyes upon the flesh of her body but she dismissed it from her mind, for if she pondered upon it to long she would have to admit that his stares gave her a different feeling then the stares of previous men. In truth she was trying her best to contain her feelings, the fact that the attention of his eyes caused a tingle to begin at her toes, penetrating into her heart; the same heart that had been convinced that she would never find love in it's truest form, someone who would whole heartedly love her and want her for who she was inside rather than what she looked like on the outside. Shawn found such reflections to be overwhelming and at the same time invigorating and even arousing. Goosebumps began to form upon her skin, not because it was cold in the tavern but because of the company in which she held and such thoughts of him that she entertained within the confines of her private mind.

He flattered her with his words. She would be betraying herself if she didn't smile and so she did. Her grin was glowing with a blush due to what his words meant to her. Yes it was odd that they seemed to have found Imperia and was both forced into starting a new life. What did this mean? Was it fate that brought the two of them together? Shawn vividly recalled the day that she ran into Ulfr. In fact she dreamed of it every second since it happened. And now she was here, here with him at the same table, upholding a very interesting conversation with him, or so she thought. The half Elf could only hope that Ulfr was feeling a quarter of what she was. Perhaps he was. Why would he say the things that he was saying if he wasn't? Then again maybe it was just idle talk, conversation to pass the time.

Words freely flowed from her, even if they were out of context. It felt wonderful to be able to finally release all of the pent up words that she held within. "The Captain was like a father to me. He had lost his own daughter and so I guess I reminded him of her. Lucky for me he protected me. But you are right. If it had been another man perhaps he would have had given in and taken me." A chuckle issued forth from between her full lips. Shawn felt the need to hold nothing back from Ulfr. This was an odd feeling for her since she had never felt such an urge to tell someone of her life's history. She continued to reveal. "I have had relations before, when I was a slave. But the male in which I thought loved me also loved many other of the female slaves there." Shawn paused. "But it's not a big deal. I was young and really didn't know what true love was at the time. Lucky for me the Captain gave me another chance at life.....so perhaps I can find someone that I could 'bestow my love and affection' upon. For now though you are again correct...we seem to both be starting anew. It's refreshing to know that I'm not the only one in Imperia that is in a similar situation as me. But I still don’t know what to do with the gift that I’ve been given."

"I have been given a second chance, a chance to restart my life, finally putting the past behind me and not living with it constantly haunting me." For a mere moment Shawn concentrated upon the last words that left Ulfr's mouth. She could take it no longer. Her eyes met with his as she looked upon him with a curiosity that could no longer be bound. In a second her hand was reaching over toward him. Softly her fingers trailed over the marking upon his forehead. Perhaps he felt the compassion that was radiating from her, perhaps not, but she was gentle all the same as she spoke softly toward him. "Tell me what this means? I think that I know but...." Shawn stopped in mid sentence but continued to soothingly rub his brand as if she were massaging away all of the stress of what it meant to him.

[Ulfr Grimsson]

Ulfr had started to wonder at the way that his heart reached out for the elfen woman who sat so close and revealed so much of her past, a past that would have been extremely difficult for her. She had been so vulnerable, never sure of her future, her life always at the whim of another in every way, from the food that she ate, her very body itself and even her life. His lips tightened and the guilt burned hotly within him. His life he had squandered, chances and opportunities he had been given, never had he been at the whim of another, his fate had always been in his own hands. And what had he done? He had acted a fool, a fool in ways that still made him squirm to think of it and this woman, how would she react if he were to reveal his past to her as she had revealed hers to him.

He guessed only too well what she would think. Derision. Now more than ever did he repent bitterly of his past for how could he risk the attention of this woman. He could imagine her lip curling in disgust at how he had failed to make use of his chances, had indeed deliberately in unintentionally thrown his chances away. And yet, there was a reason he still wore the brand, not so much to act as a warning to others, for he hoped that he had learnt his lesson, but as a reminder to himself. And yet, and yet... The pain of admitting it was greater than he had expected.

He had become lost in his thoughts, though he still listened to what she said, treasuring her words, and the touch of her hand on his forehead, on the centre of that where his thoughts were concentrated was like a second touch of the branding iron. He jerked at the touch but then froze for her touch was gentle and though her fingers burnt his skin, the feeling was one of pleasure and not of pain.

He swallowed, at a loss as to how to answer her and instead just looked for a moment into her eyes, wild and blue like the sea that she spoke of, a sea that was forever barred to Ulfr for there was nowhere to run there should he meet his people and only one end, for he would not fight, not resist their final judgement.

He swallowed again, and a thrill of fear ran through him. She knew? Perhaps... She had travelled, surely she had come into contact with his people who were always by choice seafarers. His dreams of knowing this woman shattered under the suspicion that she had trapped him here despite the knowledge that it had been his and not her suggestion. But still she touched him and he would have endured much for that touch, perhaps even sat and allowed her to sink her dagger into his black and unredeemed heart.

You know? The words stumbled out as though these were the first words he had spoken for a dozen patterns. He averted his eyes from hers, unable to bear the shame and stared into the wooden tabletop. His voice came soft, barely audible over the noise of the bar. It is a mark of my people. But not one pride, no, not pride at all though it was pride that caused it. He flicked his glance up at her face for the briefest moment before dropping it again. He had to speak, to admit to his guilt, why else had he left the brand there and not attempted to get it removed?

It is a warning, a warning that the bearer of the mark is... untrustworthy. His hands gripped the ale in a death grip, knuckles whitening, but he forced himself to continue. It is a mark of exile, forever barring me from my homelands. His throat closed and he could speak no more for the time being but merely stared in dispair at the table.

[Shawntay]

Of all people Shawn learned, by the patterns of her own life, not to judge a person by their past. This time would be no different especially when she saw how her curiousness affected the one that she touched so tenderly. She didn't mean to trap him into revealing his past, she was merely curious. If she had known that it would have struck him in such a way perhaps she would have restrained from asking. Me and my stupid inquisitiveness, why can't I just keep my tongue bridled. Now I most likely have chased him away. Stupid slave that I am! Inwardly she nailed herself to a burning stake until she withdrew her hand, observing his repentant actions as every part of his body displayed regret. How could she ever bring her heart to judge someone harshly after such an exhibition? She couldn't.

Shawn bent forward again and whispered, desiring no ears to hear what she held for only him to hear. "I knew what the mark meant, from the moment that I ran in to you. Many guests paid the captain to take them places. I met many different races and kinds of people." Again, without thinking about the results to her actions, Shawn reached out and lifted his chin so that she could look into his eyes, the depths of them likely deepened by his own experiences in life. "Please look at me. The past is the past. We can only learn from it and try to make the rest of our life a better one. And to me it looks like you are ready for such a drastic change. Please do not allow me to press you further. If you do not wish to speak of what happened then you don't have too. What your past holds is really none of my business. I'm so sorry."

Inwardly she hoped that he would 'want' to speak further as to what he did to earn such a fate but she couldn't bring herself to press him about it, now it was left to his own accord if he wished to reveal more of himself to her. Shawn drank of her ale deeply, wanting to drown any words that might want to escape through her lusciously sharp lips. Now she would just listen. Shawn handed him the floor, so to speak. It was up to him to free his mind and heart, if he wanted too. The female sat back in her seat and took a deep breath, her chest rising and falling accordingly. She allowed the ale to freely seep into her blood stream as she awaited his next move.

[Ulfr Grimsson]

Ulfr had sunk into a pit of despair, shutting out all possibilities and hopes in his mind so that the pain of the inevietable rejection would not be so great. He deserved it of course, that was something that he didn't deny and perhaps the pain would be something to prevent him ever doing that again but it didn't make the pain any less painful for the time being.

Her voice sounded low in his ears and the words struck deeply, confirming that she had indeed know. He tensed at the words and prepared himself for what was to come next, trying to take it fairly accepting the blame and not trying to evade responsibility as he had done in the past. Her fingers light on his chin were unexpected, but he allowed her to lift his head, expecting the mocking and triumphant look in her eyes, judging him for his past.

The words of power did not come and the lines of a frown creased outwards from between his eyes as he returned her gaze as requested and attempted to understand what she was saying for it was so very different from what he had expected.

He stared for a moment, at a loss for words and allowing what she had said to percolate into his mind. You are sorry? The words blurted out and he shook his head, remembering the ale that his fingers still grasped and he drunk from it gratefully and deeply, draining it dry.

You have no reason to be sorry, it was my actions and no others that led to this mark being given to me. He waved a hand disparagingly, amazed that anyone let alone this beautiful woman whose scars only added to her mystery and allure could or would not judge him without knowing.

Oh, for the longest time I didn't understand how I ended up where I did. It was I was convinced that I had been treated unfairly, that I only did what everyone else did, but my eyes have been opened and the memories that I hid from myself returned. He stared into the empty tankard but brought his eyes back up to hers.

I am ready for change now. His lips twisted bitterly, I understood what I did and despise the person that I was, but I am still the person that I was and I don't know that I have the strength to become the person that I want to be.

He looked at her frankly. I won't lie to you, the person that I was deserved this reward. I hope that I am changed, but I don't know that I am, how can I tell? He glanced back at the tankard, his guilt and shame clear on his face before glancing back up. Can I get you another ale? Before you go, he added under his breath.